


Right Here Waiting For You

by FruitsOfPassion



Category: Free!
Genre: Background characters - Freeform, Established Relationship, Fluff, Future Fic, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, M/M, rintori - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-02
Updated: 2014-09-02
Packaged: 2018-02-15 22:22:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,628
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2245470
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FruitsOfPassion/pseuds/FruitsOfPassion
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“I forgot about everything, I was so focused on winning and getting to the Olympics that nothing else mattered, but that didn’t mean I stopped loving you.” Rin admitted.</p><p>“Well, congratulations. You won your precious gold medals, I hope to god it was worth it.” Ai scoffed, breaking out of his arms.</p><p>“No it wasn’t, every day I regret what I did but I’m back and I’m going to make things right.” He promised.<br/>…</p><p>It had been ten years since the two men had last seen each other, ten years since they last spoke, ten years since their relationship had ended.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Right Here Waiting For You

_“I’ll miss you.” Ai admitted, scuffing up the front of his trainer as he toed sadly at the ground._

_Today Rin was leaving, he’d graduated, he’d been scouted, he was fully on his way to the Olympics, he was finally going to live his dream. There was only one, small problem._

_He’d fallen head over heels in love with his old roommate Ai. His beautiful smile, his enthusiastic personality, his infectious laugh, his caring demeanour, his breathless moans. All of that combined to make an utterly perfect person that Rin absolutely adored._

_“I’m gonna miss you too.” Rin replied, pulling the shorter boy into his arms and flush against his chest._

_Rin let his head drop and inhaled the familiar scent of his boyfriend. The scent that drove him wild, made his pulse quicken, while at the same time made him feel safe and loved._

_“I could push it back a year.” Rin mumbled._

_“No.” Ai said firmly, pushing himself out of the embrace. “This is your dream, what you’ve been working your whole life for. You can’t just give that all up for me.”_

_“Who said anything about giving it up? Just postponing it slightly and then you can come with me to Tokyo.” He shrugged, knowing he wouldn’t be able to spend a year without Ai in his arms._

_“You’re being ridiculous.” Ai shook his head with a tender smile. “A year is such a long time in the sports world, fresh newcomers will be scouted and you’ll be forgotten. Your chance is now and you need to take it.”_

_“But what about you.” Rin protested, sporting his signature pathetic pout that often got his own way._

_“What about me? I’ve got enough here to keep me busy and then in a year I’ll come join you.” He smiled, as if the whole situation didn’t bother him but the lie was clear on his face._

_Much like Rin, Ai didn’t want to be alone, he wanted to bury himself in their relationship and never surface again but it couldn’t be that way, life still needed to carry on._

_“You promise? Even though I’ll be gone a year you promise you won’t forget me?” Rin asked, he’d never let himself love someone before but now he had he wanted to do anything to keep them._

_“I promise.” Ai kissed him lightly on the lips. “I’ll always be right here waiting for you.”_

_Rin pulled Ai into one last embrace, savouring the warmth he felt from holding Ai, the sweet scent that he always seemed to have, the soft hands that always managed to sneak under his shirt to caress his back muscles._

_“Good luck Mr Olympian.” Ai whispered. “I know you’ll do great.”_

…

With a gasp, Rin woke up from another memory filled dream of his sweet Ai.

That was the last day he ever spoke to Ai, face to face or over the phone, it was almost as if the boy, the relationship they had shared, never even happened. He hadn’t wanted things to turn out that way but life has a funny way of screwing up the things you love.

He’d been busy with training and promoting himself that he hadn’t even noticed the time pass until it had been six months and Rin had never called Ai, never written to Ai, never gone back to visit Ai. By that point Rin felt too guilty to just call out the blue, act as if everything was the same. It would have to be some grand gesture to show that he still loved him, that despite everything Ai was still the centre of his world.

But when he finally found the time to go back he realised it had been over a year and Ai had graduated and Rin had no idea where he’d gone, who’d he become, all he knew was he’d royally screwed up and lost his Ai forever.

Sure, he’d achieved his dream but for what? A collection of cold medals that couldn’t hold him at night, that couldn’t love him. What was the point of basking in the glory of achievement if you didn’t have anyone to share it with?

He wished he could say that after ten years he’d gotten over his sweetheart from his adolescence but sadly Ai was still all he could think about. In everyone he dated Ai would always loom over their shoulders, magnifying their once minor imperfections. They wouldn’t giggle enough, they wouldn’t close their eyes when they smiled, their eyes weren’t blue enough, their skin not soft enough, hell he’d even dumped someone for not having a beauty spot to kiss.

Recently, he’d given up his quest for love and resigning to the fact he’d never be over Ai, how could he forget someone he’d technically never broken up with? It was almost as if a part of his heart clung to this fact, refused to give up on Ai because as far as it was concerned they still belonged to each other.

With a groan, he settled back into his bed, hoping to fall back into an undisturbed sleep where Ai’s face didn’t constantly haunt him.

…

_“Aren’t you excited Rin-senpai?” Ai asked, restlessly bouncing in his seat._

_“Yeah, but not quite as much as you.” He laughed. “And I keep telling you, stop with this senpai business.”_

_Rin knew it was a pointless argument, alone Ai had no qualms dropping the honorific but in front of the team he insisted on still using ‘senpai’ despite the fact they were now dating. He stated it kept things professional, stopped people thinking he’d get special treatment as captain’s boyfriend._

_It was a stupid idea really, the team knew Rin was completely objective when it came to his captain duties. He treated Ai the same as everyone else, despite the possessive bite marks that littered his pale skin. But if it made his boyfriend happy he’d let the odd ‘senpai’ slide._

_“You need to calm down.” Rin sighed, trying to focus on the scenery whipping past the bus windows and not the boy practically vibrating next to him._

_“I can’t, I finally get to swim the relay with you today senpai. I can’t wait.” He smiled, radiating both anticipation and nerves._

_“Come here, I’ll help you to relax.” He smirked, opening his arms slightly._

_Ai blushed furiously at the expression he had become quite familiar with over the past few months, he nervously glanced around the bus to make sure they were without an audience._

_“We can’t, what if someone sees?” He hissed, Rin rolled his eyes playfully at his worries._

_They were sat at the back of the bus and the only possible people who would notice were Momotarou and Sousuke who had long since learnt when was the right time to avert their eyes._

_“I think everyone has better things to than watch the two of us.” He said, completely disregarding Ai’s earlier concerns and pulling him onto his lap._

_“Rin-senpai, stop.” He panicked but was soon cut off by his boyfriend’s lips against his own._

_As soon as Ai felt the soft contact of skin he found himself caving, no longer worrying about anyone else on the bus and focusing solely on Rin. He slowly opened his mouth and allowing Rin’s tongue to slide between parted lips, engaging in the usual dance of passion, accompanied by satisfied and lusty moans. The kisses affectively distracted Ai from his nerves, at least for the rest of the journey._

…

Rin sighed as he was knocked awake by his head dropping harshly against the window of the plane. He rubbed at his eyes and noticed the still dark sky out of his window.

He wasn’t due to land for another couple of hours and he’d hoped to sleep for most of the journey but obviously his body had other ideas.

Overall his flight had been uneventful and pretty much the same as it always was. Two spacious first class seats, optimistically booked by his agent hoping his star client would find someone to travel with, the usual hushed murmurs of fellow passengers as he made his way to his seat, the clicks of phone cameras as he placed his bag in the overhead storage with a flash of his muscled abdomen and the occasional brave fan who ventured over once they were in the air for a picture or autograph, sometimes both.

But now, in the hush of most passengers being asleep, he couldn’t help but notice the cold, empty chair next to him. Always alone, he’d spent the past ten years mostly alone, fleeting relationships and friendships that never seemed to last.

He imagined Ai sat next to him, looking up at him with sleepy eyes through heavy bangs, yawning as he talked, trying to lull Rin back to sleep but only working in sending himself to sleep again.

But he knew that ship had sailed, Ai would have moved on, found someone who cherished him, gave him everything he deserved and Rin would be nothing more than a distant memory, a foolish mistake he’d made in his youth.

A couple of years ago he’d managed to get a hold of Ai’s new number, through his sister’s fiancé who was, apparently, still in contact with the man. He’d called and immediately felt the same rush of excitement to his heart when he’d heard Ai’s voice but he’d frozen, fair too nervous to actually speak and abruptly hung up. This had continued for a few weeks until a deep voice he didn’t recognise answered, threatening him to leave Ai alone or he’d be forced to call the police.

The calls had stopped straight after that, when Rin realised Ai no longer needed him and most likely never would.

…

_Rin walked down the path to his house, stopping slightly when he noticed Ai stood frozen in at the gate._

_“What’s wrong Ai?” He asked, taking a step towards his boyfriend._

_“I can’t do this.” He shook his head, backing away from Rin’s outstretched hand. “I can’t meet your family.”_

_“It’s really just my mum, you’ve met Gou plenty of times before.” Rin shrugged._

_“Yes, but just as your friend, not anything more. What if they don’t like me?” He sighed._

_Truth was, Ai had absolutely nothing to worry about, Gou already adored him and no doubt would do so even more now that she knew her brother had finally confessed and secured the boy as his own. As for his mother, well she’d love anyone who put up with her son, it was just an added bonus that Ai also happened to be kind, friendly and completely loyal._

_Rin had reassured him of these facts numerous times on the train ride over but clearly Ai was not taking the bait, stubbornly refusing to accept more than one Matsuoka liking him._

_“Of course they’ll like you.” He encouraged with a smile. “And even if they don’t what does it matter? I do and that’s what’s important.”_

_“I guess so.” He said, nervously nibbling on his lip._

_With the moment of distraction Rin securely grabbed his hand and dragged him towards the door, stopping him from finding any way of escaping. With a reassuring squeeze to Ai’s hand he rang the doorbell and listened the scramble before Gou threw the door wide._

_“Ai-chan!” She cried, pulling him by the wrist and out of her brother’s hold._

_“Ah, hello Gou.” Ai blushed._

_“I’m so glad you’re here! When onii-chan said he was bringing someone special with him I hoped it was you but I couldn’t be sure and here you are. And holding hands with Rin no less!” She gushed, dragging him further into the house with Rin following behind with a smile._

_He watched fondly as Ai was thrown into the madness that was his family and finding himself completely at home. And it turned out, Rin had been right all along, his family absolutely adored him._

…

Rin stood in the gate at the front of his old house, small smile on his lips, he was finally home. His smile spread as he walked up the familiar stone path, his suitcase wheel catching on the crack in one of the slabs that he’d tripped over many times in his childhood.

With a laugh he tugged harder on the case, freeing it from its pit as he continued the journey to his front door. With a shaking hand he brought his hand up to the bell, he hadn’t told anyone he’d be coming back, he just hoped they’d be happy to see him.

“Rin?” His mother asked, opening the door to her son.

“Hi Mum.” He grinned, nervously rubbing the back of his neck.

Beyond the occasional phone call and Christmas card his family had not really heard from him in the ten years he’d been away. Sure they’d seen his races and other snippets on TV but it was nothing like seeing him in the flesh.

He noticed the tears begin to well in his mother’s eyes, the wrinkles there far more prominent than they used to be, deep creases formed as she smiled, specks of grey could be seen in her red hair but yet she seemed exactly the same. She still had that warmth and love a mother always had.

“My baby boy!” She cried, throwing her arms around her son and holding him for the first time in such a long time.

In return, Rin wrapped his arms around her and squeezed, inhaling deeply so his senses filled with her same old scent, a mixture of washing detergent, rose and mint. He could never explain where these smells came from but he knew they were undoubtedly the smell of home.

“Mum. Who is it?” Gou called, walking into the hallway and freezing when she saw who was here.

“Hey Gou.” Rin smiled, detaching himself from his mother.

He looked his sister up and down and realised how much she had grown in his absence. Gone was the teenage girl he’d left behind and in her place was a woman. The guilt ate at his heart as he watched her, he hadn’t come back for her graduation, her engagement party, her house warming. Always claiming he was far too busy for a pointless trip home.

“Onii-chan!” She grinned, that same voice she always used when she saw her big brother.

She launched herself into his arms, almost knocking Rin over in her hast to be close to him.

“Oh Rin, you’ve got such great timing.” His mother hiccupped through the last of her tears. “Gou just came over to go through wedding plans. She was hoping you’d give her away.”

“What? Really?” He asked in shock.

“If you think you can make it.” She told him, smiling up at him with wet eyes.

“Of course I can.” He whispered, his voice breaking as he too became chocked up.

“Come on in Rin.” He mother said, grabbing his bag and pulling it inside.

With a smile he placed a soft kiss on his sister’s head and followed after his mother, Gou safety nestled under his arm.

In that moment he realised, no matter how neglectful he’d been his family would always love him, forgive him for his wrongs when they knew he was planning to improve.

He just hoped the same could be said for Ai.

…

_“What are we doing here Rin?” Ai asked, nervously glancing around the posh restaurant._

_“Hi, I’ve got a reservation under the name Matsuoka.” Rin said to the host, ignoring Ai’s wittering._

_“Of course, right this way sir.” The host smiled, leading the couple deeper into the restaurant._

_Ai sat down on the chair that had been pulled out for him by the host, shooting a confused glance up at Rin as he sat opposite._

_“Your waiter will be with you soon.” The host assured them before handing them each a menu and backing away from the table._

_“What have you done?” Ai asked sceptically._

_“What do you mean?” Rin whined, slightly offended._

_“You never do stuff like this, last time you did something vaguely romantic was because you’d trodden on my goggles and broke them. So I repeat, what have you done?” He narrowed his eyes, Rin thinking he looked more adorable than threatening._

_“Alright, truth?” He asked, Ai offering a curt nod. “I was feeling guilty.”_

_“Because…?” He prompted._

_“Because, like you said, I never do stuff for you. We’ve been together six months and not once have we gone out for a proper date.” He groaned at his own lack of finesse in relationships. “So consider this our belated six month anniversary dinner.”_

_“Rin, you’re so sweet!” Ai gushed, smiling widely in adoration at his boyfriend._

_“Yeah, well you deserve it.” He mumbled, rubbing his neck._

_“But you don’t have to do all this for me, I’m happy just spending time with you. To me, it doesn’t matter what we do as long as I’m with you.” He said, leaning across the table to place a quick kiss on his lips._

_Rin smiled back at his boyfriend before they fell into silence, both looking at their own menus with the occasional gentle rub or nudge of legs under the table._

_Once their orders had been placed and their menus taken away Rin scooted his chair around the table to be closer to Ai, raising his hand in apology as the wood scrapped loudly across the tiled floor._

_“This place is amazing!” Ai admired, eyes sparkling as he took in his surroundings._

_There were chandelier like lights handing from the ceiling, crystal wine glasses on every table, more cutlery than courses you could physically eat, there was even a man softly tinkling on a grand piano._

_“Only half as amazing as you.” Rin whispered against his neck, pressing a soft kiss there._

_“And you say you aren’t romantic.” He giggled, Rin nuzzling further into the nook in embarrassment._

_Slowly, Rin’s hand moved from his own lap and into Ai’s, gently caressing his thighs and trailing further up. Ai’s eyes widened when he felt the hand palming at his crotch._

_“Rin, not now.” He whined, knowing his boyfriend had quite an affiliation for very public displays of affection._

_“Why not?” He said in hushed tones, delicately licking the shell of Ai’s ear._

_“This is a classy place.” He moaned as Rin slowly lowered his zipper. “Please wait until we get home.”_

_“I can’t, you’re too irresistible.” He whispered, nibbling his lobe._

_All protests died on Ai’s lips as Rin’s hand effortlessly slipped inside his boxers and he finally got the contact his body craved._

_“Your drinks are here.” The waiter said, announcing their arrival back at the table._

_Ai jumped a foot in the air at the voice, cheeks flushed as he stumbled over his words at the embarrassment of being caught in the act. The waiter either hadn’t noticed or was too polite to comment but Ai still refused to let Rin carry on, sulkily swatting his hands away when they ventured too close._

_But it had all been worth it when Rin finally got him home and Ai practically pounced on him after spending the whole dinner frustrated and horny. He made a mental note to take Ai out to restaurants more often._

…

Rin walked down the old streets that he’d grown up on, noticing how the shops had either closed down or changed, very few of the originals remained.

One shop in particular caught his eye, a quaint little bakery called ‘Silver Linings’.

Rin was never one for sweet things, especially not cakes, he found them far too claggy, but yet he found himself inexplicably drawn to this bakery, his feet guiding him in that direction without his mind having a chance to protest. He could always have some savoury bread, he reasoned as he pushed to door open, a bell ringing as he stepped inside.

“I’ll be with you in a moment.” A girl called over as he walked in.

He flashed a small smile in return before slipping into a chair by the door.

He glanced around the shop in surprise, it was nothing like the sorts of places he preferred and yet he found himself completely at home. None of the furniture matched, each table having a variety of chairs surrounding them, the decorations ranged from framed pieces of art to simple French posters, all the mugs, plates and cutlery he could see were different, the cakes on display didn’t possess that factory processed perfection but instead held a home-made charm and he was sure he could see a cat napping on one of the corner chairs.

Somehow, this mess of differences meshed together perfectly, the quirky bakery was completely endearing.

“What can I get you?” The girl asked, pulling a notepad out of her patchwork apron.

“Just a coffee thanks, black.” He said, barely glancing at the menu in front of him.

“Really? Can’t interest you in any cakes?” She questioned, tilting her head slightly.

“Nah, not got much of a sweet tooth.” He admitted sheepishly.

“Well I’m sure you can find something to eat, we’ve got something for everyone.” She told him, gently pushing the menu towards him. “I’ll get your coffee.”

“Thanks.” He smiled, politely picking up the menu and glancing over it.

The waitress hadn’t been lying, there really was a wide selection, each adorably named. Sweet Dreams, a puff pastry filled with cream, Rabbit’s Tail, a carrot cake, Sailor’s Delight, a lemon cheesecake, Tiger Tiger, a cheesy plait. But one cake had caught his eye named The Olympian.

It was a rich, dark chocolate gateaux with coffee icing, surprisingly the only cake Rin found he could stomach. He decided, as a small nod to his career, he would order The Olympian when the waitress returned with his coffee.

Placing the menu back on the table Rin jumped at the sound of the door behind him being thrown open, the bell practically knocked off its perch as an excitable red head bounded into the bakery. Rin watched as he ran up to the counter, effectively distracting his waitress from making his coffee but that wasn’t what was bothering him. What bothered him was the fact he was sure he knew this man from somewhere, but he couldn’t quite place his face.

“Kira, darling, where is he?” The red-head asked, bouncing on his feet.

“In the back.” The waitress, now revealed to be Kira, shrugged.

“Can you get him for me?” He inquired, never once losing his enthusiasm.

“Fine.” She rolled her eyes.

“Thanks.” He smiled.

“Ai!” She cried, leaning slightly towards the window into the kitchen.

“What?” A voice called back, Rin’s blood turning cold as familiar tone reached his ears, it couldn’t be.

“Momo’s here to see you!” She replied, shooting an annoyed smile at the man stood in front of her.

And just like that everything clicked into place, why he knew the red head, why this whole place had called to him, why his favourite cake was named after his own professional. Ai had finally done it, after nights of talking about his unrealistic dreams Ai had actually opened a bakery.

“I could have done that you know.” Momotarou pouted, shuffling his feet.

Then, the door to the kitchen were thrown open and out stepped an older Ai covered in flour. Rin heard his heart in his ears as he looked over the latest arrival, the slightly choppy hair, the taller frame, the thinner body as he’d clearly lost muscle mass, but he was still his Ai. Same smile, same gorgeous face, same adorable beauty mark.

“Ai!” Momotarou cried, running over to the other man and wrapping his arms around him.

Rin clenched his fists slightly at the sight, was this the deep voice that had threatened him over the phone a few years back to stay away from Ai. Was Momotarou just waiting until he graduated and then wormed his way into Ai’s heart, effectively stealing what rightfully belonged to Rin.

“What’s got you so happy?” Ai asked, still having to look up at the younger boy.

“I met a girl.” He practically sung, Rin sighing in relief at the confession and at the fact he released Ai from his grip.

“Really? The stag beetle collection finally worked?” He joked, wiping his hands off on his apron that was littered with smiling fruit.

“Why have you got to be so cruel to me Ai?” Momotarou said, clutching his heart in fake pain.

“You just make it too easy.” He shrugged with a small giggle.

“And to think she has a friend I was going to introduce you to.” He stuck his tongue out.

“I’m not interested.” Ai told him sternly.

“Oh come, you haven’t been out with anyone for so long.” He protested.

“That’s not true.” He defended himself.

“Yes it is. The last guy didn’t count.” Momotarou said with a dismissive wave.

Rin was practically radiating anger at the idea of some other guy with his hands all over his little Ai, he could just about handle Momotarou. As much as he’d hate him he would have to admit the guy was decent, random men that Ai pulled he couldn’t be so sure about.

“Why not?” Ai questioned.

“He was far too weird.” He said, Ai giving him a disapproving look. “Do I have to remind you of the things I heard through the walls?”

“Okay, okay.” He held his hands up in surrender. “He was… interesting, but he still counts unfortunately.”

“Fine, I’ll let it drop for now.” He said, admitting defeat. “But you can’t stay single forever.”

Rin unconsciously nodded along with Momotarou’s point, someone as perfect as Ai should never be single, he should always have someone to constantly dote on him, even if that person wasn’t him.

“Ai.” Kira spoke up, ending the pairs back and forth. “As you’re out here take this coffee over to the table in the corner.”

“Sure.” Ai agreed, turning towards her as she poured in the last of the coffee.

Rin realised that the drink would soon be making its way over to him in the hands of Ai and he was not ready to face him just yet, after ten years he felt he needed to be more prepared for their first meeting. In panic he threw cash down on the table, a very generous tip for just the coffee, and ran out the door before Ai had even got a chance to grab the cup.

…

_“Do you understand what good timing is?” Ai whispered, self-consciously glancing up at the bunk above him where his roommate lay._

_“Its fine, he’s fast asleep.” Rin muttered, sliding his hand up Ai’s now bare chest and gently teasing his nipples._

_Rin had text Ai at about three in the morning claiming he couldn’t sleep, the vibrations against his pillow had woken the other boy and he had invited his boyfriend over to sleep in his bed. What he hadn’t expected was for Rin, after less than half an hour, to start stripping him down and grind against his crotch._

_“He might wake up.” He hissed, pushing Rin away._

_“Then we’ll have to be extra quiet.” He smirked._

_Leaning forward, Rin captured the other’s in a kiss, he trailed his tongue over Ai’s soft lips, feeling them part underneath his touch and welcoming him inside. With his free hand he reached over to the bedside table, opened the drawer and grabbed the lube he knew was kept in there._

_Pulling back he poured the liquid onto his fingers, both boys panting harshly from the early kiss. Once his breath was back Rin dived back in, claiming Ai’s mouth once again._

_Ai silently prayed that Momotarou wouldn’t wake up, he was a heavy sleeper so the chances that he would were slim but there was a first for everything. If he did wake and heard them Ai knew he would owe him big time in the morning but as he felt a slick finger slide inside himself he found he didn’t really care._

…

Rin walked back to his mother’s house, heart pounding erratically from his encounter with Ai, if he could even call it that.

All the feelings he’d tried to keep pushed down for so long suddenly came rushing back to the surface, all the love, all the lust, everything in such a short space of time. It had hit him like a truck the moment he’d seen Ai again, he’d always known the feelings were there but he didn’t realise they were still as strong as the moment he’d left him.

He missed his Ai, but he guessed he wasn’t his Ai anymore. After ten years can someone still be yours? Just because Rin’s heart still belonged unconditionally to Ai didn’t mean that the sentiment was returned.

Wobbling on his feet he stumbled through his front door, relishing in the silence that greeted him. He was glad the house was empty because right now all he wanted to do was crawl into bed and never wake up again.

Noisily he ran up the stairs, throwing himself under his bed sheets, he clenched his eyes tightly shut, hoping to sleep and forgot this whole day had ever happened.

But every time he closed his eyes see was Ai’s face, his smile, his small mole, his still tiny physique. His ears rung with Ai’s voice, his giggle. Old memories resurfaced of times he’d spent with him, times he’d tried to forget to decrease his pain but yet they always remained at the back of his mind.

With a groan, Rin flipped himself over onto his back, tightly clutching his shirt above his chest as his breath came out in harsh, wet puffs.

He lay there in the dark until his mother returned home from work and fussed over him as any mother would over her ill child. But no matter how many pills she forced down him, how much hot soup she gave him, how many hugs she offered she could not mend his broken heart.

…

_Rin rolled over onto his side as quietly as he could, trying not to disturb the other person in his bed. He smiled as he watched his precious Ai sleep, chest gently raising and falling with his breathing._

_His silver hair was splayed across the pillow, creating an angel’s halo affect around his face. His soft puffs blowing Rin’s own hair as he shuffled closer, basking in the warmth that was his boyfriend. The dorms always had a slight chill in the winter so on the nights Sousuke would nicely offer to bunk with Momotarou and Ai would sleep in his bed he would have his own personal hot water bottle._

_He smiled at the signs of last night all over Ai’s naked chest, his still swollen lips, hair curling slightly from the sweat that had dried at the tips, he didn’t doubt he looked exactly the same. He knew that he get a couple of jeers from the team at practice today, both for the marks and for the noise that those who lived close by would have heard._

_It would embarrass Ai to the extent of swearing off sex until they had their own house with brick walls. But this celibacy would last about three days, sometimes less if Rin pushed hard enough, so it didn't overly concern him._

_Sleepily, Ai wrapped his arms around Rin’s chest, burying his face into the skin with a contented sigh._

_“Morning.” Ai croaked, pressing a kiss onto his chest._

_“Morning.” Rin replied, slipping his arms around Ai’s waist._

_“What time is it?” He asked, yawning heavily from the effort._

_“Early.” He said._

_“Can I sleep for a little longer?” He whined._

_“Course you can.” He laughed at his sleepy boyfriend._

_“Okay. Night night sweetie.” He mumbled, slipping back into his dreams._

_“Night night Ai.” He whispered._

_Rin leant down and placed a kiss onto his soft hair, smiling in the knowledge that Ai would forget this whole conversation, as he did most mornings. Ai would sleepily tell him all sorts of strange secrets, a most common one recently was their future. He would talk about Rin becoming a famous Olympian while Ai ran his own bakery, swimming in his spare time to stop putting on any weight from all the sweets. He’d also talk about how when they started their own family Ai would stay at home to raise the children while Rin was able to help out when he’s around but not feel guilty about leaving to train._

_Rin never told Ai about his early morning mumblings, knowing Ai would be embarrassed at being caught planning a future with someone he’d only been with for a few months, but in truth they never bothered Rin. In fact, he liked to imagine that one day all of Ai’s rambles would come true and they’d have the life he dreamed of._

…

After days of hiding away Rin finally built up enough courage to make his way back to Silver Linings and face Ai. He was frozen outside the door, shaking like a leaf in the wind at the thought of what was to come.

Put him on the starting blocks of a pool with thousands watching him and a whole country backing him and he wouldn’t even bate an eyelid. But yet one person could intimidate him to his core, make him feel like that nervous seventeen year old boy again trying to stumble through his first confession.

With a deep breath he pushed the door open and stepped inside, feeling Ai’s familiar comfort seeping out of every inch of the bakery.

“I’ll be right there.” Ai called, not even bothering to look up from his notebook.

“Okay.” Rin shouted back, Ai’s head shooting up and whipping around at the sound of his voice.

Rin smiled softly as their eyes met for the first time in years but it was never return, instead a small mouth opened in shock and whispered a few choice words.

“Here you go.” The customer said, reclaiming Ai’s attention.

“Oh thanks.” Ai blushed, taking the notebook out their outstretched hand that’s he’d dropped in his shock.

Rin flopped into a chair and watched Ai’s fumble through his costumer service, probably very conscious of the eyes on his back.

“Kira, can you make me a skinny latte?” Ai called, making his way over to Rin’s table.

“Coming up gorgeous.” She saluted, turning towards the coffee maker.

“Hi.” Ai said coldly.

“Hi Ai.” Rin said softly, amazed to finally have Ai this close to him once again.

“What can I get you?” He asked, flipping to a clear page in his note book.

“What?” Rin stuttered, after being apart for ten years that’s really the first thing Ai wanted to say to him.

“A drink? Coffee? Tea? Latte?” He listed, never looking at Rin.

“Oh, erm a coffee?” He choose, although it came out as more a question.

“Coffee, great.” He scribbled, hands shaking despite his cool demeanour. “Anything to eat?”

“Seriously Ai?” He questioned.

“Or do you just want to stick with the drink?” He continued to talk at Rin, ignoring his response.

“That’s all you’re going to say to me?” He asked, wanting nothing more than to wrap this distressed boy up in his arms but knew he shouldn’t push it.

“We have a variety of different baked goods, both sweet and savoury so there’s something for everyone.” Ai was beginning tear up the more he talked just further crushing Rin’s heart.

“I…” He started only to be cut off by Ai’s rant.

“Our specialities are our rich chocolate gateaux and ginger snap biscuits.” He said, voice breaking towards the end of his sentence.

“Ai.” Rin whispered, reaching his hand out for the other boy.

“No! Don’t!” He hissed, backing away from his hand in disgust. “Just order something or leave.”

“Alright, I’ll have The Olympian.” He offered, the only cake he’d remembered reading last time.

“Shocker.” Ai rolled his eyes, all earlier tears replaced with anger.

“Ai, we need to talk.” He pleaded, trying, and failing, to look him in the eye.

“We need to do no such thing.” He snapped, turning from the table and heading away.

“Ai! Please don’t walk away from me!” He shouted, standing up in his seat.

The whole bakery fell into a hush at the outburst, all eyes staring at the celebrity figure tightly gripping the wrist of a small town bakery owner as if he was his lifeline.

“Stop it Rin.” Ai growled, Rin gasping at the sound of his own name falling from those perfect lips after so long but yet filled with hatred.

“Don’t go.” He whispered, very aware of the tears in his eyes.

“If you’re that desperate to talk come back later.” He said, forcibly removing his hand from around his wrist.  “I’m not going into it now.”

Ai stomped across the bakery and into the kitchen, never remerging for the remainder of Rin’s visit, sending Kira over with his order rather than having to face the man himself.

But if he thought he was going to get rid of Rin that quickly he was mistaken, this time he wouldn’t give up so easily.

…

_“Rin, can you help me with my homework?” Ai whined, turning his pout on the boy lounging across his bed._

_“What is it?” He groaned, dragging his body over to his bed._

_“English.” He sighed, pathetically lying across his desk._

_“You know one day you’re going to have to do your own English homework.” He scolded._

_“I know but I just don’t understand it.” He cried, throwing his hands up in expiration._

_“Well, I’m going to help you to study.” Rin told him with a smug smile._

_“Really Rin? You will?” He gushed, looking up at his boyfriend in admiration._

_“Course, I’m going to write down some phrases in English and you try to translate them.” He said, gently pushing away all of Ai’s text books and grabbing his notebook._

_He quickly wrote three phrases on the page and turned it towards Ai, whose eyebrows scrunched slightly at the foreign writing._

_“You… you’re… abs… absolute… absolutely… gor… gorge… gorgeous… You’re absolutely gorgeous?” He translated, a dusting of pink on his cheeks._

_“Well done.” He praised. “Next?”_

_“Erm… the… moons, no stars… do not… don’t… shine… as… light… lightly… brightly… as… your… eyes… The stars don’t shine as brightly as your eyes. Rin, these phrases are embarrassing.” He mumbled, blushing furiously._

_“I can’t help the facts.” He shrugged. “One more to go.”_

_“I… want… to… miss… you. I want to miss you?” He asked, not fully understanding the sentence._

_“Almost.” Rin laughed. “Try again.”_

_“I want to… oh, kiss! I want to kiss you.” He smiled, so proud he’d got it right he’d barely registered what he’d read._

_“Great work Ai!” He congratulated, leaning forward and hoping to claim his kiss._

_With a smirk Ai leaned in as well, but instead of kissing Rin’s awaiting lips he whipped the notebook from his hands and sat back in his chair._

_“My turn.” He grinned._

_“Fine.” He sighed._

_Ai wrote a sentence down and flipped it around for Rin to read, barely being able to control his excited smile._

_“I wood like to kiss you two.” Rin smiled at Ai’s attempts at English. “Close enough.”_

_With a quick shrug Rin leant in and captured Ai’s lips, effortlessly lifting him off his chair and carrying him over to the bed, their English lesson long forgotten._

…

When Rin returned to the bakery that evening the whole place was dead, half lit while Ai calmly wiped down the tables. When he heard the bell he froze but never glanced towards the door.

“I didn’t think you’d actually come back.” Ai said, finally turning towards his guest.

While they’d been together Ai had developed sort a sixth sense to Rin, second guessing his next move before Rin even realised he would do it, always knowing he was in the room before Rin had even spotted Ai. It seemed like it was a skill he hadn’t lost.

“I said I would.” He said, trying to sound calm despite his erratically beating heart.

“Yeah, but what you say and what you actually do are two very different things.” He scoffed, folding his arms.

“Ai, I didn’t come here to fight.” Rin told him, taking a tentative step towards him.

“Then why did you come here?” He sighed.

“Ai, I’m all finished back here.” Kira said, breaking the tension in the room. “Oh, hello.”

“Hi.” Rin smiled awkwardly.

“You can head out then Kira.” Ai said. “I’ll finish up.”

“Okay.” She nodded, walking towards the door then freezing. “I’m sorry, but are you Rin Matsuoka the swimmer?”

“Erm, yeah I am.” He admitted, rubbing the back of his neck.

“Wow. I knew I recognised you. How do you know Ai?” She asked, gesturing towards the other man.

“We used to go to school together.” Ai answered for him.

Rin couldn’t keep the look of disappointment from his face, after everything that had once been between them all he was deemed worthy of now was someone he used to go to school with.

“Wow, small world huh?” Kira grinned, Rin shrugging helplessly in response. “I’ll see you tomorrow Ai.”

“Night Kira.” He smiled, instantly dropping once he was left alone with Rin.

“Ai, I’m sorry.” He apologised.

“Oh, well then that’s fine. After ten years all I really needed was a half arsed apology.” He snapped, turning back to the table and furiously cleaning.

“Look, can I just explain.” He tried but Ai was not interested.

“What is there to explain? You went off and became this great swimmer and forgot about me.” He said.

“It wasn’t like that, I promise.” Rin placed his hands on top of Ai’s to calm down his cleaning.

“I should have seen it coming really, I was barely good enough for you while we were together so once you were famous what hope did I have?” He laughed bitterly.

“That was never the problem, you were always good enough.” He whispered.

“Then why? Why did you just leave me? Not even a single bit of contact in ten years. How did you think that made me feel Rin?” He cried, spinning around and glaring up at him in anger.

“I was busy.” He defended, knowing it was pointless, there was no excusing how he’d treated Ai.

“I get that Rin, really I did. I kept making excuses for you but you just pushed it too far. Just a simple text would have done but I didn’t even get that!” He shouted, pushing Rin away and walking over to the counter top to continue his cleaning of already shining surfaces.

“I was too embarrassed, I’d left it so long I thought you wouldn’t want to hear from me. Besides, it’s not like you made much of an effort either.” Rin said, but the way Ai froze he knew it was the wrong thing to say.

“No! Don’t you dare try to pin this on me. I gave you space, let you train without your annoying little boyfriend hounding you every day.” He hissed, poking Rin in the chest with every point he made. “After a couple of months I did try to get back in contact but your phone had been disconnected and you never gave me your new address. I took the hint and gave up, so why don’t you take mine now and leave me alone.”

Without giving Rin so much as a chance to respond Ai began walking back to the kitchen, reacting quickly Rin followed, wrapping his arms around his waist and stopping him from getting away.

“Get off me!” Ai squirmed.

“Not until you listen to me.” Rin shouted, tightening his grip.

They stood frozen for a minute, chests pressed flush against each other, hearts beating in tandem, blue eyes staring deep into red ones, all the pain, the hurt, the love fresh on the surface once again.

“It wasn’t just you okay? I forgot about everything, I was so focused on winning and getting to the Olympics that nothing else mattered, but that didn’t mean I stopped loving you.” Rin admitted.

“Well, congratulations. You won your precious gold medals, I hope to god it was worth it.” Ai scoffed, breaking out of his arms.

“No it wasn’t, every day I regret what I did but I’m back and I’m going to make things right.” He promised. “I don’t care if it takes another ten years I will win you back.”

“You don’t mean that.” He gasped.

“I do.” He whispered, pulling Ai back into his arms, this time he willingly came.

“And if I say no?” He asked, breath fanning against Rin’s skin.

“Then I’ll miss you for the rest of my life.” He said against his lips.

Closing the final millimetres Rin pressed their lips together, his body on fire in a way he hadn’t felt in years, sparks shooting through each of his nerves at the feel of Ai again.

“No, no.” Ai shook his head, gently pushing him away. “I’m not letting you do this to me again.”

“It’s different this time, I’ve changed.” He reassured him, after that small contact he needed more, he’d craved Ai for so long that he refused to give him up.

“You say that now, while you’re home for a couple of weeks and I’ll let myself fall in love with you and then you’ll go.” His eyes began to tear up. “I’m done waiting for you Rin.”

The sound of the bell above the door broke the moment, a loud voice booming out in the otherwise quiet room.

“Come on Ai, it’s time to go home.” Momotarou frowned, noticing the third person in the room. “What the fuck is he doing here?”

“It’s fine Momo, Rin was just leaving.” Ai said calmly. “Weren’t you?”

“I guess so.” Rin nodded. “I meant what I said Ai.”

“As did I.” He quipped as Rin turned towards the door.

He walked out, pretending he didn’t hear Ai’s tears echoing through the bakery, pretending he didn’t see Momotarou rush to his side, pretending he didn’t have tears of his own spilling down his cheeks.

…

_Since Momotarou had found out Ai had started training alone late at night he insisted on telling him every ghostly rumour he heard about the school. At first Ai had just brushed them off as tall tales but now each creak, each shadow made his blood turn cold._

_That was how he ended up, shaking in the water as a dark figure slowly made his way over to him._

_It had to be his imagination, there was no way the school was haunted, as far as he knew nobody had died on the premises so there was no reason for a ghost to be lurking around. But all his reasonable thoughts were no help to him now._

_“Ai.” The phantom said._

_Ai let out a scream as the ghostly hand reached out for him, he was going to be killed by a ghost who had a vendetta against him for whatever reason he wasn’t sure. Maybe it was for all the times he’d fooled around with Rin in the changing rooms, the ghost not enjoying having his personal space tainted by their passionate love._

_“Ai, calm down!” The spirit moved into the light, revealing the stunning face of his boyfriend._

_“Rin?” He asked, clutching at his heart. “What are you doing here?”_

_“I came to check you weren’t over working yourself.” He answered, bending down by the edge of the pool.  “What was with all the screaming?”_

_“I thought you were a ghost.” He mumbled in embarrassment._

_“Right, it’s time for bed I think.” Rin decided, holding his hand out once again._

_“Just one more lap.” He begged, backing away._

_“No, bed. Now.” He leant further forward in an attempt to grab the other boy but instead lost his footing and fell into the pool._

_“Rin!” Ai cried, rushing over to the bubbling water where he’d fallen._

_“Jesus!” He shouted, resurfacing again. “I’m soaked.”_

_“Sorry Rin.” He apologised. “I’ll get out now.”_

_“You might as well do another lap now as we’re both in the pool.” He rolled his eyes._

_“Okay, it will be my quickest yet.” He promised, readying himself and swimming away._

_Rin watched him as he went and he had to admit this late night training was doing wonders for his times, he was faster than Rin had ever seen him. As he got closer Rin dropped under the water, waiting until he was near enough that he could pull him close, into his arms and against his lips._

_In surprise Ai’s lips parted creating the perfect entrance for Rin’s tongue, the coolness of the water and the heat of his mouth combined together to make the kiss so indescribable, like nothing he’d ever experienced before._

_But it was short, they pulled away breathless very quickly before resurfacing again with large gulps of air._

_“What was that for?” Ai panted, both from exertion and passion._

_“I was just proud of you.” Rin admitted, giving him a chaste kiss. “Now, let’s head back to the dorms so we can get you to bed.”_

_“Okay.” He smiled, climbing out the pool with Rin by his side._

_Whether they would be doing much sleeping in bed was another issue entirely._

…

Rin was heading back to Tokyo tomorrow, he’d had a nice break seeing his family and old friends again but he knew he’d have to get back to training one day.

It had been a week since he’d last been inside Silver Linings and seen Ai, granted he’d sent gifts, letters, flowers but whether they’d been happily received was another story.

He waited until he saw Kira leaving before he headed inside, knowing he’d be able to catch Ai on his own, hopefully before Momotarou turned up.

“Sorry, we’re closed.” Ai said, gasping when he turned around to see Rin stood there.

“I know, I won’t take long.” He smiled.

“What do you want this time Rin?” He asked, nervously glancing at the sunflowers next the cash register that Rin himself had sent, he allowed himself a small smile before he spoke up.

“I’m leaving, going back to Tokyo tomorrow.” He told him.

“Right, well good luck with everything.” Ai said, crossing his arms over his chest in a careless gesture but Rin could see through it.

“I want you to come with me. Please.” He pleaded, holding out a ticket for Ai.

“What?” He asked, slowly taking the envelope from his hands.

“Please Ai, I need you with me. By my side once again.”

“I can’t just give everything up, I’ve got my own business, I’ve got a life.” He shook his head.

“I know that, and I respect that but it doesn’t have to be forever. It can just be for a month or two, like a holiday. And if you like it then you can start a new bakery, one in Tokyo. There’s a derelict building round the corner from my apartment, it would be perfect for you. Bigger than this place, you can expand.” Rin rambled until he felt the envelope pushed back into his hands.

“I’m not that hopeless little kid that follows you around anymore, I grew up.” He smiled sadly.

“Please Ai, I still love you.” He confessed, tears pouring freely down his cheeks.

“I know you do.” He whispered, reaching up and gently brushing away his tears.

“I don’t know how to stop loving you.” He sobbed.

“You will do one day, I promise. One day you’ll get there.” He reassured, after all this time the soft tone of Ai’s voice still managed to sooth Rin.

“Are you there?” He asked, dreading the answer he was going to receive either way.

“Not yet, but soon we’ll both be fixed.” He giggled slightly, detaching himself from Rin one last time.

“Here’s hoping.” He tried to joke.

“Good luck Mr Olympian, even though I’m not there I’ll always be cheering you on.” Ai said, spinning on his heel and heading back to the kitchen.

With a deep, shaky breath Rin headed out on his way, pausing briefly by the table at the door and placing the envelope with the ticket on top. A small part of him hoping that Ai hadn’t given up on them completely yet.

…

_“What do you think Rin?” Ai asked, proudly looking around his decorated dorm._

_He’d wrapped fairy lights around the metal of his bed, casually draped tinsel across the desks and purchased a small, plastic Christmas tree._

_“Very nice.” He smiled._

_“Now put your present under the tree.” He instructed, pointing towards the roughly wrapped gift in his hand._

_“Why can’t I just hand it to you?” He asked in confusion._

_“Because you have to do things properly.” He shook his head._

_“But I’m closer to you.” Rin protested._

_“No, it has to go under the tree.” He sulked, forcibly taking the gift out his hand and placing it under the tree, next to his own immaculately wrapped present. “It’s our first Christmas as a couple and I want it to be special.”_

_“Okay.” He sighed, knowing when it came to key points in their relationships, first kiss, first time, first dates, Ai wanted to do things properly and became very stubborn if he didn’t get his way. “Whatever you want us to do.”_

_“Great.” He smiled, pulling Rin by his wrist to sit by the tree. “Merry Christmas Rin.”_

_“Merry Christmas Ai.” He said, embracing Ai and holding him securely against his chest._

_It wasn’t technically Christmas, it was two weeks early but they wouldn’t be able to spend the actual holiday together so Ai had insisted on a small celebration, just the two of them._

_Pulling away, Rin reached under the tree and pulled out his gift, gently placing it in Ai’s awaiting lap._

_“I hope you don’t hate it.” Rin laughed as Ai began eagerly tearing off the paper._

_“I love him!” He exclaimed, grinning at the shark plush._

_“Really?” He asked, not sure if a toy was a great first Christmas present._

_“Yes! Look he’s got little teeth like yours.” He giggled, making his new toy bite his boyfriends arm._

_“Yeah, yeah. The resemblance is uncanny.” He rolled his arms._

_“He’s my own little Rin Rin.” Ai smiled, hugging the shark close to your chest._

_“My turn.” He said, excitedly grabbing his own gift._

_He tore off the paper and bow to reveal a small black box, hastily he pulled off the lid to see a small silver duckling charm on a chain. Gingerly, he picked the necklace out the box, letting the charm drop down and catch the winter sunlight._

_“I know it’s silly but you always used to compare me to a little duckling the way I followed you around.” Ai told him, refusing to meet his eye._

_“I did.” He agreed, placing the necklace over his head._

_“It’s just the right length that I will always be near your heart.” Ai mumbled, head buried deep in the fluff of Rin Rin. “It’s too cheesy isn’t it?”_

_“What are you talking about? It’s perfect.” He smiled as Ai peaked out from his hiding place._

_“Really?” He asked._

_“Really.” He nodded. “Perfect just like you.”_

_Rin placed his hand on the back of Ai’s head, weaving his fingers through soft hair, before pulling him closer for a slow kiss._

_“Rin!” Ai whined. “You ruined our first Christmas kiss!”_

_“How?” He asked._

_“Because it was meant to be under the mistletoe.” He pouted, holding out a sprig of the plant._

_“Well, that’s still pretty good for a second kiss.” He grinned, pushing Ai’s hand up higher and swooping down to capture his lips once again._

…

Rin sat in the plane seat with a heavy heart, never before had the empty chair next to him seemed so wide. He wished that, any minute, Ai would bustle onto the plane, apologising profusely for being late but eventually settling into his seat by Rin’s side, where he belonged.

Absentmindedly, Rin began to play with the chain around his neck, listening to the subtle zip as he moved the charm up and down. Glancing down into his palm his heart constricted at the small duck looking back up at him.

Far duller than when it was first given to him, for all the days he wore the necklace, all the kisses he gave his little duck for luck before a big race, all the strokes he gave the duckling’s back for comfort when he was at his lowest.

He knew that going back to see Ai had given him closure on their relationship, after ten years of the unknown they had finally closed the book on what had been between them. Ended things properly this time.

But Rin didn’t want closure, he wanted what he used to have. He wanted to talk to Ai every night and tell him the stupid stories of his day, he wanted to text Ai pictures every time he saw a cute animal he knew he’d love, he wanted to wake up each morning to Ai’s face, fall asleep every night to his soft hugs.

He wanted Ai more than ever.

Without thinking through his next decision, Rin jumped up in his chair, grabbed his luggage and quickly made his way down the aisle of the plane.

“I have to get off.” He said, arriving at the side of the air hostess.

“I’m afraid I can’t let you do that. We’ve just finished our checks and are about to shut the doors.” She explained. “So if you don’t mind taking your seat again.

“It’s important.” He protested. “I’ve left something special behind.”

“I understand that but as I said earlier there’s really nothing I can do.” She said sympathetically.

“Please, for me?” He smiled, he hated using his fame to get his own way but he felt that currently desperate times called for desperate measures.

He fought hard to keep the satisfied look off his face as his award winning smile worked its magic, a blush quickly spread across the young girls face and Rin knew she was caving.

“Okay, but just this once.” She firmly told him.

“Thank you!” He exclaimed, placing a quick kiss on her cheek, Rin could have sworn he actually heard he squeal but he may be imagining things.

He practically ran towards the doors of the plane, not even bothering to apologise to the people he was accidentally hitting with his bag, he had more important things to worry about.

“Wait!” The air hostess called. “Will you be coming back?”

“Probably not.” He shrugged, running down the portal to the terminal. “Who knows?”

Right now he couldn’t care less about Tokyo, about his swimming, about his medals, all he cared about was Ai and doing whatever he could to make the man smile again.

…

_Rin nervously paced his bedroom, he’d text Ai about five minutes ago, almost the moment Sousuke had walked out to meet his friends. Ai had eagerly replied, saying he’d be right over and as soon as he read that text he regretted his decision, he couldn’t go through with this. It was too much, too soon._

_“Hello Rin.” Ai greeted, walking into the room and tilting his head in confusion at his tense boyfriend. “What’s wrong?”_

_“I… We… The things is… I…” He groaned. “Maybe you should sit down._

_“Okay.” He said slowly, taking a seat on the bed._

_“Ai, there’s something important I need to say.” Rin started._

_“Oh.” A small voice spoke, the boy looking down at his knees._

_“And I really don’t know how to go about it.” He complained, wishing he could just be like a normal person and express his feeling rather than be the emotionally constipated human he was._

_“I know what you’re going to say.” Ai told him. “I was just waiting for it.”_

_“You were?” He asked, he thought he’d been so subtle about it but he should have known that Ai would be able to see through his whole act, he wasn’t stupid._

_“Yeah, from the very beginning really.” He laughed slightly but Rin noticed that it sounded hollow. “And while it’s not exactly a mutual feeling I respect you enough not to fight about.”_

_Rin’s heart cracked at the sound of Ai’s word, it wasn’t a mutual feeling? The first time Rin ever falls in love and it’s one sided, that would just be his luck. Why should anything ever work out for him when so much has already gone wrong?_

_He tried to calm himself down, this wasn’t the end. People didn’t break up over one being in love while the other wasn’t quite there, and in time, who knows, maybe Ai would love him too._

_“Are… are you okay with this?” Rin nervously asked._

_“I don’t have much of a choice do I?” He responded, pushing himself off the bed. “I guess I’ll head out now, despite everything I’ve enjoyed our time together and I’ll see you at practice Rin-senpai.”_

_No, no, no! Rin screamed in his mind as Ai walked towards his door, head down refusing to look at the pathetic mess he was leaving behind. He couldn’t lose Ai over something like this, there had to be a way to move past this._

_He jumped forward and grabbed Ai before he could escape, tightly holding him in his arms._

_“Let me go.” Ai struggled against his confinements. “I need some time on my own, please.”_

_“I’m so sorry Ai but please don’t leave me. I love you too much to ever lose you.” He whispered into his hair._

_“You what?” He asked, turning in his arms and looking up at Rin with teary eyes._

_“I love you.” He confessed, proudly saying what he’d wanted to for weeks._

_“But… You were going to… I thought…” Ai shook his head with a smile. “I love you too.”_

_He wrapped his arms around Rin’s waist and buried his head into his chest, leaving small wet patches on his shirt._

_“You said the feeling wasn’t mutual.” Rin said in confusion, but was still glowing in the love confession._

_“I thought you were breaking up with me.” He admitted._

_“I could never do that.” He said, lowering his face and kissing Ai._

_Through the kiss he felt Ai gently pushing him, guiding him backwards and towards his bed. Rin’s heart fluttered at the treatment, far more used to Ai being led by him rather than the other way around. He let the younger boy lead him, push him down on the bed and slowly climb on top of him, he let Ai be fully in charge of their love making._

_A while later Sousuke returned while Ai gently slept, muttering to himself about a tie on the door system they needed to bring in. But Rin didn’t care, far too absorbed in the boy he loved completely with his whole heart._

…

Ai sat at one of the stools at his counter, staring down at the plane ticket in his hand, as he had been doing for the past few hours. He realised he was far too late, the plane would be in the air by now, taking Rin with it.

Rin. The only person he’d ever truly loved and had loved him in return. The only person who could break his heart and yet own it at the same time. The only person he wanted to be with but also dreaded seeing his face again.

He knew it was for the best that he’d stayed behind, the people they were when they dated weren’t the people they were now but he still couldn’t help but feel some regret. Maybe he should have just gone, who could say if they would have worked out and now he would never know. It would always be a question that would haunt him for the rest of his life.

The rattling of the door shook him out of his daze, he sighed and placed the ticket back in the envelope, ready to tell whoever was outside he was closing early for the day.

When he turned and saw the same red head that had been plaguing his thoughts standing there he felt the breath knocked right out of his chest.

On shaking feet Ai walked over to the door, struggling to open the door and let the man inside.

“I thought you were going back to Tokyo.” Ai said when he finally opened the door.

“Not without you.” He replied.

Rin pulled Ai close, connecting their lips once again in a soul searing kiss. This time Ai didn’t push him away, instead let himself deepen the kiss, caressing Rin’s tongue, exploring his mouth that he’d been deprived of for so long.

The moment felt new and exciting, yet familiar and safe as they were finally connected after being apart for so many years.

Rin pushed Ai backwards, desperately looking for some surface to provided purchase but refusing to ever separate from him.

Ai was vaguely aware of the tingle of the bell as the door shut behind them but he didn’t care, instead too focused on the cold counter top that was pressing into his back. Pulling away for air, Ai felt himself being picked up and placed on the surface. Despite how they’d grown Rin still had to lean down to kiss his little Ai.

“I’m still pissed with you.” Ai panted, heart beating erratically.

“Yeah, I’m pissed with me too.” Rin admitted, chest harshly rising and falling.

Without any more words the couple reconnected, exploring each other and discovering all over again as if everything was the first time but with the reassurance that they knew each other, loved each other, was always present.

Maybe Rin would leave again. Maybe Ai would refuse to give up his bakery. Maybe they just wouldn’t click now they were older. But maybe they would be together for the rest of their lives.

The answers were completely unknown but returned to each other’s sides the unknown didn’t seem quite so daunting anymore.

…

_Rin lay on his bed of the dorm he shared with Ai, knowing it wouldn’t be for much longer. Once term officially restarted they’d be re-bunked and Ai would have his own first year to look after and Rin would be roomed with someone in his own year._

_Last year, he couldn’t wait until he left Ai’s side, the boy had been too nosey, too persistent, too involved in his life. But now, he couldn’t imagine how he’d ever survived without him._

_Over the break he’d realised some things about his roommate, that the feelings he felt for him were strong, far too strong to even be considered friendship. Rin had never expected that, he hadn’t expected to miss him quite as much as he did, he hadn’t expected to hover over his contact almost daily only to hold himself back from calling._

_“Hello senpai!” Ai greeted, bursting into the room with his suitcase trailing behind him._

_“Hi Ai.” He said, trying to sound casual but knew the excitement would be practically radiating out his every pore._

_“How was your holiday?” He asked, dropping his suitcase to the floor and opening it, the extent of his unpacking until Rin caved and did it for him._

_“It was good, caught up with all the guys from Iwatobi. What did you get up to?” He casually asked, as if he didn’t know that Ai’s parents had whisked him away almost as soon as the holiday had begun and only brought him back a couple of day ago, making him practically unreachable to Rin._

_“It was amazing senpai! We went to an island called Zante and it had the bluest ocean I have ever seen.” He gushed. “And I swam in it almost every day, you’d have been so proud of me senpai. The sun was lovely, always shining, so much so I came out in all these freckles.”_

_Rin swallowed thickly as Ai pulled his collar lower to reveal his slightly browned collar bone, covered in small freckles. Although he saw Ai’s almost bare body regularly this intimate showing seemed to be far more tantalising._

_“Well, we’ll have to go down to the beach this afternoon so you can show me.” Rin suggested casually._

_“That’s a great idea, I should text Nagisa to come as well. He’d been bugging me since I came back to see him.” He giggled, pulling his phone out of his pocket._

_“No! No Nagisa! Just us!” He exclaimed._

_Since they properly met Ai and Nagisa’s relationship was budding into a great friendship, but Rin could do without Nagisa taking up all of Ai’s attention today._

_“Just us?” Ai asked, wondering why Rin was so desperate to have him to himself, he usually loved having all his friends tag along._

_“Yeah, we’ve been apart for so long it will be nice to have some time alone.” He admitted, blushing slightly as he rubbed the back of his neck._

_“Okay!” Ai smiled with a blush of his own. “Whatever you want senpai!”_

_That afternoon, as Rin kissed Ai with the waves crashing around them everything between them changed, they went from being simple friends to something much more, something far more intimate. And while neither one would regret that change they knew they would never be able to go back, that day they truly fell in love and both could never imagine falling out again._

**Author's Note:**

> This is why my stories take so long to update because I waste my time on unnecessary oneshots :/ ah well!
> 
> This was only meant to be a drabble but 10,000 words letter I was in too deep, Rintori truly are my OTP :)
> 
> Huge plot hole in the amount of time Rin spends on planes, in my head Japan was massive like America and about halfway through I realised how stupid I was being but it was already too late and I’d committed


End file.
